Monday, January 23, 2012

SOAR Catch Up (not to be confused with Ketchup)

Here are my most recent SOAR pages

I saw this Glimmer Screens and was going to make a Brave Girl Truth Card out of it. Then I remember my friend Carrie loves the Dragonfly and I thought to myself "Hmm wings, I wonder if this could go in my SOAR journal." I looked up the meanings and printed them and had to paste them down.

Symbolisms of the Dragonfly

The Dragonfly’s scurrying flight across water represents an act of going beyond what’s on the surface and looking into the deeper implications and aspects of life.
 Defeat of Self Created Illusions
This property is seen and believed as the end of one’s self created illusions and a clear vision into the realities of life. The magical property of iridescence is also associated with the discovery of one’s own abilities by unmasking the real self and removing the doubts one casts on his/her own sense of identity. This again indirectly means self discovery and removal of inhibitions. 

Power and Poise The best part is that the dragonfly does it with elegance and grace that can be compared to a veteran ballet dancer. If this is not a brazen, lazy, overkill in terms of display of raw power, what is?
 Focus on living ‘IN’ the moment
This style of life symbolizes and exemplifies the virtue of living IN the moment and living life to the fullest. By living in the moment you are aware of who you are, where you are, what you are doing, what you want, what you don’t and make informed choices on a moment-to-moment basis. 

Maturity and a Depth of character
The dragonfly, in almost every part of the world symbolizes change and change in the perspective of self realization; and the kind of change that has its source in mental and emotional maturity and the understanding of the deeper meaning of life
Remember the magic is in you. You've always had the answers right in your own heart.

Soaring means yuo have to open your wings, step off the ledge and take a chance. Find it in yourself to do what it takes to SOAR

I took words my friends posted on FB and changed the fonts, etc, gave it a border and then printed them out to put in my SOAR book as a reminder that I am a good person and other great things I needed to hear.

Jessica: I Love you so much! You have one of the biggest hearts that I have ever had the privilege to say that I am loved by. There are so many people out there that care about you and that will tell you that you deserve a relationship where they love you just as much as you love them.You have so many talents and so much in your life that is fabulous. You are beautiful inside and out. You are kind, funny, and successful. When people are around your upbeat personality they can't help but bubble as well. So smile my Aunt Trish because your smile will make someone else's day

Maria Dehghan Write it all out and vent away. I find writing is a great way to release what is felt inside so we again can find the peace to breathe.

I can't say there is anyone out there for you who will last for all time, its hard to say that about you. You are not a bird who will pick a oak and nest you are bumble bee you wants to float from sweet flower to sweet flower always leaving a little of yourself while gathering more to you. What I can say is that you are beautiful inside and out that you are strong and smart and witty and anyone who has even one moment in your graces is blessed.
And no matter what else you always have me... might have to deal with some snark but I will never leave you
Love you Trish... Cinnamon

These are from my Goddess Guidebook  This one is called- FLY
I wrote: I am a brave and courageous soul. I overcome and I fly anyway. I have had a few broken wings, sometimes, both at the same time, but my wings mend and I overcome. I also am able to find my way back whenever I get lost. Since the day I was born, I have had to find my wings. I know deep inside I was born to FLY. This is whay any other existence except and Extraordinary one is unacceptable to me. I am destined to FLY. I fell out of the tree away from my family at a very young age and I learned to fly on my own. I will fly. I will fly if I have to MAKE my own wings. I am meant to SOAR.
I wrote: I have always loved the rain. I love being in a shower just so the water and the drops can pour over me. In the outside the drops can come in tiny drops or pour down in chunks of rain. To live is to stand in the rain and to do this and enjoy it one needs to understand & accept that you might get caught in a storm once in awhile But if you want to enjoy the rain, you must endure this. You must get damp or soaked, but you know what others don't and that is that you know the sun will shine & rainbows & butterflies will happily follow.
Heart on Sleeve
I wrote:  Wearing your heart on your sleeve can be a dangerous thing. People can come along & rip it right off you. That can be very scary. But if you hid it away in your heart no one can feel your love or bask in the love you have for others because you are too afraid to show it. To me, wearing my heart on my sleeve, is the only way I know HOW to wear it. I have seen many other different ways to wear it, but to me, this is the only fashionable way (I'm kidding) but to me this is really the only way I find it acceptable. I can't even TRY to hide it. If I do I wake up and WHAT? There is it on my sleeve, like a piece of popcorn that gets stuck on your face when you fall asleep watching a movie on the couch. :)  (I wrote this little words of encouragement for me next)

Continue to be an open hearted angel dear one. Continue to be Brave. You can do it. You are loved and people love you. 

Continue to be you in a big beautiful way.

My word for the year is Peace.
I took the Goddess book work and Be Urself work and the petals and combined a page.
Because of chaos and stress, many of us end up not feeling well…allergies, insomnia, hypertension, weight problems…we can numb our pain, distract ourselves from it, project it and try to deny it’s even there, but none of these escapes can truly relieve our pain. What can we do to have peace in our lives? How can we develop a better attitude? Can we even develop a better attitude? Will a better attitude even work? Will it help?
Goddess Questions: 

What do you want to feel? PEACE
Darling Heart, what do you most want to experience? PEACE
What do you want to give yourself? PEACE

 Below are the PETALS I did for PEACE. Carolyn from a Beautiful Ripple Effect linked this back to something a child did in school. Like all things I made it my own. I might do these instead of the TO DO list for each week. Not sure but it worked out for THIS exercise.

The petals are more explained in the link but I will explain how I use them. I put the word I am focusing on in the center. Then as a "To Do"  I write on the petals how I will achieve that quest. On my petals it says Blissbombed, White Hot Truth, Meditate, Goddess Circle, Willowing, Stability, Affimations, Pinterest, SOAR

This part is still from Week 3, though we are farther than this by one week. This Letting Go piece is on Forgiveness.

There are some of us who may have no problem forgiving someone who has wronged us, but,we do in fact have a problem with forgiving ourselves. When we can’t let go of our past, when we can’t forgive ourselves, we rob ourselves of the same joy and peace that we offer to anyone who has hurt us. Why?How can we willingly forgive someone else, but not ourselves? Are we not worthy of that same forgiveness? Is our self-image, our self-worth such that we can’t?

My work area last night
Also see how I use the extra images as Tabs, Letting Go, Word of the Week, Quote of the Week, etc

Even as we seek to forgive those who have wronged us so we need to forgive ourselves Life can be difficult enough without punishing ourselves! Maybe there is still something you struggle with…and you feel guilty…and you think you will never change. I’m here to say that you can change! And, what if we fail? What if we struggle and we fall? Well, we get back up and we start anew!

Forgive Yourself, Stop Punishing Yourself
 A journal jar my sister made me for Christmas has been integrated into parts of my SOAR journal.

Anything from the Journal Jar will have the post up above like this one. I will label these going forward JJar and then the question like this:

JJar: Write about feeling loved. Who has loved you in your life?

I was going to list people but instead I stared at this blank page. JJ Heller's song What Love Really Means (Love me for Me) comes to mind. I am not sure who has loved me and who has not...but I do feel what I drew in this little sketch (I have been impromptu sketching a lot more lately). It is a heart with a path going to it like a street.
The Path of Love is the path to the Heart

JJar:Write a want ad that best describes you if you were for sale

Beautiful, amazing, authentic and unique woman available.
She is brave, bold, daring, fearless, courageous, a survivor and a warrior wrapped up in one.
She loves life, enjoys every moment & is all about making each moment count.
She is a right brain creative with an amazing left brain knowledge.
She paints, draws, sings, dances, collages, is very artistic and creative.
She has a few web businesses, is driven and motivated and has an amazing fashion sense.
She has an amazing, intellectual mind, shock full of ideas & she's not afraid to put them into action.
Her hair is like sunshine. Her eyes like the truest of nature. Her skin is like porcelain. But her smile, her smile will draw you in and melt your heart.

This made me think about these pieces I had for a vision board instead I put them into two pages here...

What I Love About ME
You can read the big words.
the words written in are...
Makes each moment count
yet Gentle
Lives life to the fullest
Right brain creative
Left brain minded
Thinks of others

This one is on my other post, but I wanted to link it here as it was a part of what I worked on this week.
This time in my life has been rough with the loss of my former partner in my life. I know he hated that word "partner", but I hated calling someone I was with for 4 years my "boyfriend". To me he was so much more than that. He still is. Having the E courses to focus on has been good for me. I miss him terribly and sometimes don't know how I will ever breathe without him... but he asked me to let him go. He asked, that if I do, truly love him (and I do) that I will let him go and experience the chance for happiness. My tears pour frequently. My heart aches breakingly. But I do...I do love him and as hard as it is to say, think and believe this...I want his happiness, EVEN if it cannot be with me.

That, my dears, is true love.

I told my sister recently there is one caveat with Letting Go of love if you follow the saying... 

"If you love something let it go, if it comes back to you, it was meant to be"

The caveat is this...if you both let go, and you both are waiting then no one comes back. Does that really mean it wasn't meant to be? No. I think that is stupid if both people miss that opportunity. Will J ever be with me again? I don't know. But I have reached so far in and my arms, face, heart is cut with scars from the  barbed wire and walls he has up right now, that I can't keep scarring myself like this. If he ever wants me again...he is going to have to say he loves me, that he wants me...until then or if that never happens...then that is how it happens. The day I hear one of two things will the day I know he truly is NEVER coming back...he is marrying her or she is pregnant.

I shouldn't have hope right now. A huge part of me does not. But I know this...

Weak, insecure, needy...will get me nowhere.
Strong, confident, secure...will get me where I am going in life.

Either with him or alone. I have to get back to THAT Trisha.

Healing through art is an amazing process...and I assure works...

I am not saying I am there yet. But, I am holding to the rod. I am enduring for now. I am surviving....